Well, as many avid readers of bpbc may know, I just turned 21. I just want to write about it on here and share with you my memories…or lack thereof. This was truly the best birthday I will have ever, unless I end up having a family when I’m older and they throw me some kickass 50th birthday or something…Anyway, let’s see where to start. Well, Kel, J Stone and Crisp took me shopping for clothes for the party, since I don’t know how to dress myself. They picked out these so called “goucho” pants. I’m not one to jump on the fashion trend bus, but I must say, I liked them. Quite comfortable. I was able to buy a pair of shoes by myself as well which left me quite accomplished with myself. 21 AND I can match shoes to clothes. But enough of that. I got at the VFW about an hour early to help set up. However, I’m kind of a piece of shit and my mom and my grandmom kind of did everything. I think I put crackers on a tray…
Let’s talk about the VFW. It was a pretty nice place. Had a stage, a kitchen, a coat room, a bar, bathrooms weren’t bad. However, the decor kind of freaked me out a little. First of all, there’s a huge ass tank on the front lawn. I guess this makes sense, seeing as it is Veterans of Foreign Wars, but that was just kind of weird. It made giving directions easy though…”yeah, just go on Hulmeville Ave. It’s the house with the huge ass tank on the lawn.”
So, if you got lost…I’m not saying you’re stupid, it was dark out, maybe you didn’t see it. I also didn’t like this one sign it had in a glass display of some sort. “if you don’t like this country, there’s a (an actual little plane was glued onto the sign instead of actually putting the word plane on it) leaving every hour. It just seemed a bit brutal and unnecessary. There was also a sign on the kitchen door that said THIS IS NOT BURGER KING. YOU CAN’T HAVE IT YOUR WAY. YOU CAN HAVE IT MY WAY OR NO WAY. yikes….what was that about? and you’re probably thinking, who notices this stuff and why are you writing about it? and all I can say is, my name is Brittany Graber and shut up. But, I digress…now on to the party.
The party was awesome. Thanks so much for coming out guys. (haha, read that sentence, it made me laugh). No but seriously, I didn’t think that many people liked me. And after careful consideration, I don’t think the turnout had anything to do with the free food and beer. (i made myself laugh again) Thank you JB and Jody, for the kwanzaa gloves. I must ask however, Jody, are these really your gloves? Did I just take your gloves? or were they really for me? and if they are…are they the original kwanzaa gloves? get back to me on that sir. Donny’s gift of the semi wrapped, already opened box of wine was a huge hit. I discovered this as we decided to slap the shit out of it at my brother’s table…we did it low-key though, since kids were there. har har har. I loved how it had “Commandeer your ass” on the side. oh donny, how i heart you. If you noticed the pictures on the wall with me growing up through childhood, I just don’t even know….all I can say is, you must have noticed my chubby stage and therefore I feel totally exposed and vulnerable. I’m glad only my friends were there. yikes. I’m glad everyone could just drink. I loved it when my mom pulled me aside and said your friend with the hat and striped shirt is stumbling. Immediately, my eyes are directed at Drew, who was stumbling and wearing a hat and striped shirt. haha, I laughed. I heard you puked. good man. This is getting kind of long, and my foot is going numb, my vision is getting hazy, I’m forgetting to capitalize and I’m starting to have run on sentences…pretty much I think even my fingers are still drunk from this crazy weekend, so I’m not going to go into toooo much detail. wow…i just got pins and needles in my right hand…odd. Some highlights: dancing with my poppy. Actually pretty much anything involving him, especially when he was talkin to JB and Jody and company and I pulled out that ‘Mohammaed what’ story….I’m such an asshole. It’s funny though. I thought I told everyone about that?? no? oh, well now everyone knows. My cousin KaraLee is going to be a little heartbreaker. 16 years old and she’s dancing like Beyonce and Shakira. (and making all the guys drool). She tried to teach me some kind of dance move. It clearly didn’t work out. Doing the Romy and Michelle dance to time after time by Cyndi Lauper was awesome. I was feeling pretty faced at that time. My brother, Gary and Cip getting up and tearing a rug was quite the site. I might have gotten more of a kick out of it because of the pinot something or other I was drinking…but, yeah, everyone was doing their dance. Wendy and Greg represented on the dance floor. Dong, Adler, Shug, Donny, everyone was dancing. Thank you to Amanda who went out to her car to get her Cd with Kanye’s Gold Digger on it. That song brought together everyone, drunk and sober, old and young, coordinated and uncoordinated, etc etc. Kayte Grant made me two mix CDs. I got bottles of wine and a huge ass bottle of Grey Goose. Life is good.
Anyway, I just want to thank everyone for the best birthday ever. I seriously never felt so special before. besides the time I had to get off of the little bus blasting Grease Lightning in front of everyone at Poquessing…but that’s a different story for another time. I love my friends. It’s amazing how a little card with your photo and date of birth can give you such power. It’s amazing how alcohol is so prominent in people’s lives today. It’s also amazing how I never got an underage, and never will. Amen to that. I left for thanksgiving break a child. I’m returning a woman, a little more rotund perhaps, a little more appreciative of what I have, a little sicker, a lot richer…. ha. I want to end this by starting a slow chant with beer. so pretend i’m doing that right now. ok bye (i am such a nerd)
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That post was pretty hilarious. I’m glad you enjoyed the franscia, wrap job took me hours to complete. You just wait till xmas break when I turn 21, then the larger philadelphia metropolitan area is in for some shit. See ya in a fortnight buddy!!
i won’t even say i can’t wait to go to the bars, cause it’s not in the near future at all. a small baby could be concieved and birthed while i’m waiting to turn 21. but, you’re party was pretty much the best night of my break. **cue full house music** i can’t wait to hang out again like that, it’s not often we all get together. **tear** i hope it happens some time soon. ps… when i do turn 21 ill get you a bottle of something. so you have that to look forward to.
wen, when you turn 21…i should get YOU a bottle of something. that’s how it works. But i mean, i’ll take presents from you on your birthday if you really want. haha