Big Bouncing Breasts

Between the blindfolded lady in Halftime Show Hilarity and this article I have boobs on the brain. Okay, so I usually do anyway.

A recent study looking at the range of movement in a woman’s breast during exercise showed that boobs could bounce as much as 8 inches up and down.

8 inches! If my penis moved that much when I exercised I wouldn’t ever exceed a slow walk for the rest of my life.

According to the study “The overall pattern of the movement resembled a figure-8.”

My hat’s off to any of you ladies who can put up with that kind of action. Thank god my man boobs are small.

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Signs of the Apocalypse

Have we really reached the point where we need to send kids to school wearing a bullet proof backpack?

Can’t you see some overbearing parent make their kid wear a backpack on the back as well as their front? And to quote Lloyd Christmas - “What if he shot you in the face?”

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Judgement Day - Poker Bots Vs Professionals

Vs.
Humans continue their dominance over machines, at least for today.

The Association for the Advancement of Artificial Intelligence sponsored a 2-day poker tournament pitting champions Phil Laak and Ali Eslami against the University of Alberta’s Polaris computer program. Computers may be able to win beat Gary Kasparov in chess, but can they force a pro to go all in pre-flop holding snowmen? Two days and 2000 hands later, the humans finished on top $570. Not knowing how much each player started with, I have to imagine that it was close all the way.

Will we soon see cyborgs bluffing down the pros in Atlantic City?

For bc3alumni’s sake, I hope not.

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Goonie Action Figures - Heeeeey Youuuu Guys!

These are some pretty sweet Goonies (action?) figures from Mezco Toys.

So far the line includes Mikey, Data, Chunk, Mouth, and Sloth.

The Mikey and Mouth figures are pretty good, but Data, Chunk, and Sloth are dead on. Each figure has their own accessories - Mikey has an inhaler and Chunk has his Statue of David.

I wonder, can the Chunk figure do the truffle shuffle?

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This one time in high school, part 2

I was at football practice being my usual studly self, pancake blocking underclassmen, knocking them over, you know, being a tough guy, when my coach started yelling at me because I knocked the wrong freshman over.

Apparently I ran the wrong way and screwed up the play. Most times when this happens I heard something like “I Swear to God, you’re the dumbest smart kid I know!” or “You’ve gone plum crazy!” (one of favorites) But that day, coach was in a bad mood and it was my fault.

“I swear god God, my wife hates you because you keep me up at night wondering how you’re going to screw up the next day!”

Ouch. I remember thinking “why does he have to bring his wife into this? I’ve never even met her.” Fortunately, I was not on the receiving end of his worst comment: “Bulldog, you’re so stupid sometimes I think you’re retarded.

God I miss football.

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Would You Rather - Parents Vs Girlfriend

This week’s Would You Rather is all about getting caught doing the dirty. The question is, which end would you rather be on?

Would you rather walk in on your parents having sex or have them walk in on you?

I think I’d rather walk in on my parents, it would be easier to block that out rather than have the constant embarrassment of them having seen my girl naked and me in some awkward pose.

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