I try to keep things on BigPlansBigCrash pretty light and fun, but every now and then I need to vent. Today we focus on Bill O’Reilly. Let me just add that I don’t enjoy writing about people I don’t like because it gives them more press (even if it is only 20 readers) that they really don’t deserve. Ok, here we go.
Word travels fast. The troops over in Iraq created a funny picture in reponse to Kerry’s comments on education.
I am not one to dabble politics mainly because it results in me getting pissed off at what people do and think. If the world was full of people who think and act like me, we would all be better off…but I digress. John Kerry apparently attempted to make a crack at George W, but instead screwed himself by ripping into our Army. Good luck digging yourself out of that one John, especially with the upcoming elections.
You may have heard that the US Government has passed a law that prohibits US banks from depositing money into online gambling (poker) accounts. The thought process here is that this will crush the poker boom because people won’t be able to put money in their accounts.
The thing that cracks me up is that there are tons of offshore banks, such as Neteller, who CAN take your US Bank deposits. They then move the funds into your poker account for a nominal fee. All the Government did here is put a detour on the poker highway so now people have to drive a little further. It’s not going to stop the traffic in the street, just piss off the drivers. How you like that analogy? I’m a God damn poet.
The only reason this bill has even gone through is because
1. The government makes no money off of these gambling sites (except what people claim as taxes). If they can’t make money on it, then no one should be able to…eliminate it.
2. The Conservatives are worried about upcoming elections (at least that’s what I’ve read…I don’t follow politics too much) so they are doing what they can to appeal to religious and other tight ass groups, as trivial as their efforts are. This should really win them over.
Senator Bill Frist - who is heading the new bill efforts - claims that online gambling is a way in which terrorists go about laundering money. Are you serious? Yea, that’s it. The Hamas and PLO (that’s naive I am to world issues…Thank you Mr. Kennedy’s 9th grade simulation) are funding their efforts taking down $60 pots with full houses and straight flushes. I mean how can you honestly say something as absurd as that and expect ANYONE to take you seriously.
People amaze me. We have such dumb fucks running some of the most important positions in our country.
I’m moving to Australia…who’s coming with me?
Yeah so I would post up some of my thoughts to convince people I am in fact a real person and not a character in some fucked up sitcom. Speaking of which I’m a big fan of Curb Your Enthusiasm. I remember the first time I saw it I was a little taken aback by the extreme form of Seinfeld humor but now I love it. It just pushes the envelope in ways Seinfeld couldn’t even touch.
Anyway I was up late writing my paper on my President Truman was a douchebag for dropping the atomic bomb on Japan. For a while I actually had a sentence included in the essay that went like this: “Faced with a watershed moment in history, Truman shit the bed.” I really wanted to keep it in there but I caved…
So nobody else watched Nip/Tuck? I f-ing love that shit. Ending was so awesome tonight. Basically one of the main characters, a plastic surgeon named dr. troy, was accused of murdering this dyke (and being a serial slasher/murderer called the carver). The whole episode was about how even the guys closest friends started to actually suspect him of the crime. So the accused (and innocent) guy uses his one phone call to leak the story of him being accused. He figures that the real murderer will not want someone else taking credit for his work. So the last scene of the episode is the newest victim of the carver sitting in his office (he was released because the d.a. dropped the charges after hearing about the new carver victim). So the camera pans around to show you the person waiting to see dr. troy is the detective that was riding the shit out of the accused guy the entire episode. She was treating him like shit the entire episode, insisting that violence was in his genes and shit. The line every episode begins on and this one ends on is “So what don’t you like about yourself?” Ehh ehh, good shit huh?
Don’t worry I’ll pull some shit this weekend and make a post/voicemessage/collage out of it.
HAHA, I stumbled across this article via Daily Kos and Don’t Link This and I felt the need to share it with you all. It is basically a comparison between Liberals, Conservatives, and the Taliban on some common issues. Gave me a laugh, I hope it does the same for you:
Pop Culture
- Al Qaida/Taliban: Hate it… kill it
- American Taliban: Hate it… ban it
- Liberals: Laugh at it… boycott it
God
- Al Qaida/Taliban: God is on our side and will help us kill our enemies
- American Taliban: God is on our side and will help us kill our enemies
- Liberals: God may or may not exist and will not help us kill anyone
Press
- Al Qaida/Taliban: Control of the Press
- American Taliban: Manipulation of the Press
- Liberals: Freedom of the Press
Free Speech
- Al Qaida/Taliban: Anyone who disagrees with us is an infidel and must be silenced
- American Taliban: Anyone who disagrees with us is a traitor and must be silenced
- Liberals: Anyone who disagrees with us is in for a spirited discussion
Tolerance
- Al Qaida/Taliban: Death to the infidels
- American Taliban: Kill their leaders and convert them to Christianity
- Liberals: Live and let live
Marriage
- Al Qaida/Taliban: Marriage is only between a man and a woman
- American Taliban: Marriage is only between a man and a woman
- Liberals: Marriage is between any two people who love each other
Yea those are just a few. As you can guess the list goes on for a while. Check it out.
Changing gears, I actually was able to sit through an episode of that mtv show “Date my Mom” and all I can say is holy shit. It could possibly be one of the worst shows on television right now. It amazes me that people not only think of such shitty ideas for a TV show, but others agree and actually produce the shows. If someone pitched me the idea of “Date my Mom” I would poop on it and give it back to them. Bad form mtv, bad form. At least I still have my TRL and NEXT!. Oh, We got jokes? The only thing mtv has going for them right now is my girl Melinda on the real world. You can’t tell me she isn’t the hottest one on that show, look at that pic. Enter dirty thoughts.
Aiight time to get on with my day.
