This week’s F*ck, Marry, Kill is between the bayside girls: Kelly Kapowski, Jessie Spano, and Lisa Turtle. Who would you “F*ck”, who would you “Marry”, and who would you “Kill”. You should also justify each of your choices. If you missed last weeks FMK, you can check it: Rosie, Oprah, Or Streisand
Personally, I would obviously marry Kapowski. She got hotter in her later years. I would F*ck Lisa because I bet she is a freak in bed, but it would get old fast. Spano, I think most would kill her. She had nothing going for her but a wicked caffeine pill addiction.
Here are the girls in all their glory. Check out their killer dance scene and then Jessies “I’m so excited, I’m so excited, I’m so …. scarrrred” oscar worthy performance. Damn caffeine pills.
Who would you FMK?
Check Out:
• F*ck, Marry, Kill - Girls Of LOST• F*ck, Marry, Kill - Spice Girls
• F*ck Marry Kill - Rosie, Oprah, Or Streisand
ohhhhhh baby, i would fuck spanos brains out(did i type that out loud?) because of “showgirls”, marry kelly because well, it’s kelly, and kill lisa, and no i’m not racist, but she was just a materialistic bitch that never gave screech, aka dustin “dirty sanchez diamond”, a chance
I think this is the all time best scene from Saved by the Bell….good choice to justify your decision to kill jessie spano…i agree you!
agreeeee WITH you…my bad
Gotta agree with the site on this one, but for different reasons. I’d kill jessie right off the bat. She is way too uppity and has that woman’s rights, feminist thing going on, probably didnt shave her legs or armpits while at bayside high. Gross. F the S out of Lisa, she always bugged me, it’d be a hate F. Marry Kelly Kapowski, its every boys childhood/prepubescent dream.
I pretty much have to agree with the original post, but you should really bang Kelly, and that’s all that matters. Here are a few things to consider…
1. Jessie is going to be very successful and could be a great sugar ‘mama’ (shout out to AC). You could stay at home all day playing the Wii with the kids (which the femnazi would love), or even have her buy the Max for you. While she’s at the law firm, you’re hitting on the new new class of high school babes.
2. Lisa is already minted. You could have the same scenario, only she wouldn’t be all stressed out from work, just shopping.
3. Both scenarios entail Mommy going to rehab for an extended period of time due to her coke addiction, and if this took place during the summer while Kelly is off from teaching underpriveleged kindergardeners in Compton, she would come stay at the mansion to help take care of your kids. Remember, you two shared a night of passion back in the day. If mommy has an unfortunate accident with some pills or a sewing machine, you get Kelly and the mansion.
The moral of the story is… intercourse with Kelly is like points on the board in football. I don’t know what that means really, but it sounds like something John Madden would say. Oh, and kill the one of the other two that has PMS that particular week.
haha great response boss…ill be back soon for those mocha grandes
err grande mocha too
First of all, I would f*ck the holy hell out of Kelly. No question about that!
I’ve actually had quite a crush on Lisa since the pre-Kelly and Jessie days (Good Morning, Miss Bliss, anyone?)so I would marry Lisa.
Jessie is dead!
I would Marry Kelly……so i could f*ck her all the time…kill Lisa…and Fuck jessie spano…cuz of the movie showgirls!