OK so I don’t hate many people in this world. Sure there are a bunch that I don’t care for, but I don’t actually HATE them, except for Kevin Federline. I dunno what it is about that fag, but everything he does just pisses me off. So why am I writing about him?
I came across a picture of his “concert demands” that he gave to the House of Blues concert hall in Chicago. A funny side note is that he did not sell enough tickets to fill the place, so they had to give them away for free. HAHA. I saw The Starting Line at the House Of Blues a few months ago in Atlantic City, NJ and they had no problem selling out.
Anyway, Federline’s dressing room demands are pretty absurd, but I guess if I was famous - or at least thought I was - I would have a similar list.
It would go something like this:
- A Nintendo Game Console with Tecmo Bowl, Punchout and the Power Glove
- 3 Talented Strippers: 1 Blonde, 1 Brunette and 1 Asian/Black mix
- 1 Stripper Pole
- 1 Case of Blue Moon with 3 oranges cut up into quarter inch slices
- 3 “Three Brothers” Pizzas from the Jersey Shore (Seaside Heights). 1 White, 1 Pepperoni and 1 Plain
- 5 Bottles of Lemon Vitamin Water
- 10 Sticks of Nag Champa Incense
- 1 Boombox with the following CDs: Reel Big Fish - Turn the Radio Off, Midtown - Save the World Lose the Girl, RX Bandits - Progress, Goldfinger - Hangups
- 1 Bottle Listerine Mouthwash
- 1 Laptop with Internet Access
- 1 Bathrobe with some pimped out slippers
- 2 Decks of Playing Cards and Poker Chips
- Hi-Def Flatscreen TV and DVD Player with the following movies: Boondock Saints, The Sandlot, and Mighty Ducks 2
- Any nearby groupies looking to put out
- A couple of Omni Sumo Bags with optional curtains to hang around them (for privacy / groupies / strippers )
So that is most of what I would require in order to perform my best. What would you all need? Leave it in the comments.
Here are Federline’s demands below (click it for a bigger picture)
notice Diddy didn’t specify “hot” strippers, just talented ones. If I were setting up Diddy’s dressing room I’d find the fattest chicks who could dance and stick them in there.
For my dressing room I’d ask for the following
1. A window that over looks the parking lot, rosebud is very important to me and I want to be sure she’s okay.
2. Hidden camera to capture me at my worst moments so that I can “leak” the tape when I am no longer famous in order to be in the spotlight again.
3. Random clothes strewn about the room so it looks like it’s been used and I didn’t just show up for the night to say whatever city I’m in is the rockingest place ever”
4. A waterbed under a mirror on the ceiling.
5. Masseuse, preferably Asian so that there is the possibility of a “happy ending”
6. 137 fluffy pillows so that I can build a sweet fort and not let girls in.
Certainly reasonable demands, I’m a simple guy.
well, it’s well thought out and i don’t know if it can be arranged, but…
1. 10 cases of miller light
2. assortment of wawa hoagies
3. strippers from daydreams
i love steve’s requests, so him! I have never thought about this but I think it is a wonderful idea. i like to think im a simple lady, its easy to please me, i only would like the following things…
1. strippers, hot stirppers, male and female (thats right)
2. A pole (for me, not them)
3. a salsa bar (medium, mild, hot, xtra hot, fruit salsa, tomatilla….)
4. sam adams look-a-like
5. karaoke machine
6. monopoly and scrabble
7. herbal tea set-up (good idea k-fed)
8. All sam adams 18 award winning styles
9. 9 hole minature putting course
10. a tattoo artist from miami ink
11. flat screen tv with log fire dvd playing
12. dentist to the stars
13. fully stocked bar
14. vogue magazine
15. bagel, cream cheese with smooshed dorito nacho cheese chips inbetween
16. the cast of the office
17. snoop dog
18. trampoline
19. man to fan me with palm tree leaves and feed me red grapes
20. fondue
21. a tarot card reader
22. pac lady machine
anything else i think i need i will bring myself!